Sex wasn't always Taboo: exploring female sexuality

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It’s funny that sex is taboo in our society, you and I wouldn’t exist if it wasn’t for sex, yet it is something that makes people uncomfortable to talk about. Everyone at one point has sex, it is a vital part of our evolution, yet somehow it is still frown upon it.

Sex wasn't always taboo, in fact ancient practices like tantrism explore the concept of sex as a gateway to enlightenment. More over even in our ancestral African spiritual practices you can understand the impact of sexual energies as personifies in deities such as Akua ( the fertility goddess) or the vodoun Mumi wata. What’s intriguing is the connection between the divine feminine and sexuality.

"female learn to compromise before they learn to cum”

In both practices stated above the female sexual pleasure, is highly regarded. For instance, in tantrism, the woman’s body represents the only gateway towards god. A Tantric practitioner must first learn to please every aspect of the woman’s body. In today’s society however female sexual pleasures ( in heterosexual intercourse) tend to take a back seat. This is exemplify in the term coined “the orgasm gap” were a mere 57 % of women aged 19-40 usually climax during heterosexual sex, while their male partners climax about 95% of the time. WTF, that is a huge gap, especially considering the fact that the CLITORIS IS THE ONLY ORGAN IN THE WORLD CREATED SPECIFICALLY FOR PLEASURE. A females clitoris houses 8000 nerve endings, that’s 4000 more nerves (i.e sensations) than a man’s penis, yet many women are still getting the short hand of the stick.

In this month’s topic I gathered various information from experts, scientific papers and stories from the spiritual practices of sex dating back to the precolonial time in Africa (and around the world), to break the “sex is a taboo myth” specifically when pertaining to women.

Let’s start with the basics: A quick overview of the female anatomy


  1. The vulva: the word vulva means covering, and rightfully so the vulva covers the women’s area of sexual pleasure.So let’s take a closer look

    1. Mons veneris/ pubis: its is basically a pad of fat that in love making allows for cushion so that the hard pubic bone does not cause discomfort.

    2. The Labia major (the outer bigger lips) the Labia minora ( the small inner lips). contains oil and sweat glands and a bit of muscular fiber that contracts when arounsed. The labia minora main function is sexual they are similarly packed with sensitive nerve endings and blood vessels. They also swell when aroused just not as much as the clitoris or penis.

    3. Urethra: is the area where our urine comes out

    4. Vestibule: it is the area between the two sides of the labia minor, it is another area that is rich in nerve endings, they actually can erect and become as firm as the clitoris. It is even believe that the G-spot is actually an extension of the vestibule.

    5. Lastly we have the clitoris: When most people think of the clitoris what they are really thinking about is the glans clitoris which is literally just the tip of the clitoris that you can see and touch. Added to the tip is a shaft that connects the glans to the pubic bone. The shaft then spread out to divide into two parts that connect to the pelvic bone. The actual clitoris is an organ of amazing size. People often compare the glans clitoris to a man’s penis. However they are not the same as stated above the clitoris houses way more nerve ending than a penis, the clitoris sole purpose is for pleasure while the penis is also use to urinate and lastly the clitoris doesn't become rigid when aroused because of its ability to let blood flow freely which allows it to swell and relax easily; enabling a woman to have multiple orgasm simultaneous.

  2. The vagina is internal: The vagina is the actual portal, you cannot really see the vagina just the entrance it is a bridge that connects the outside world to the uterus and eventually your ovaries. That’s not to say that the vagina itself is not loaded with various nerves and blood vessels that help intensify your sexual experience.

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